Project

                I must be crazy, but I am excitedly planning to paint my bedroom over the Christmas holiday. Surely I will have enough to do pertaining to the holidays but not having homework, I am planning on having a substantial amount of free time. For instance, I won’t be writing blogs.

 We have lived in our home for four years and the master bedroom and bath are the only rooms that have not been painted.  Parents’ bedrooms always seem to rate low on the list of decorating projects in most households.  I think it is because we want our public rooms to look the best. These rooms, kitchen, living room, family room, guest bath, all take high priority.  Then the children’s bedrooms get decorated. For one, they are generally fun and easy to design even for someone who doesn’t take a particular interest in decorating. Also, maybe it is a parent’s hope that by making the children’s bedrooms cute they will desire to spend more time in there playing rather than dragging all of their toys into the living room.  It hasn’t worked in my home, but like I said, it is a hope.

Our master bedroom is the only bedroom on the first floor. I’m not sure if that is the reason, but somehow the master bedroom has often looked more like a dumping ground for uncatagorized items.  The room for castoffs.  Come two weeks from now, castoffs will be cast out. The bedroom will be reclaimed and the décor will be unified through design, and most significantly a beautiful new wall color. 

My biggest decision is whether or not to go with a cool and contemporary gray or to go with a soothing, slightly warm but rich cream color. No matter what it is, I know it will look better than the builder white I have been looking at over these past years.  Paint is the biggest bang for the buck in achieving impact in a room. Bring on the rollers and brushes.

I Just Thought This Was Cute

To Believe or Not To Believe

The question I have come to dread, “Is Santa Claus real?” This time it was posed by my nine year old son.  Dread. Dread. Dread. Long pause. 

“Why do you ask? Stalling technique. Answering a question with a question. I have been through this twice already with my two older girls.  It’s never pleasant.  The one part of me is anxious to be able to take ALL of the credit for the wonderful presents. And being able to shed the pretense is liberating when it comes to strategically wrapping presents in different paper, different signature. After all, it is important that Santa and mommy not have the same wrapping paper, or handwriting. 

But that other part of me is sad to end that extra bit of magic that Santa adds to Christmas. I suspect that my son has listened to the well-reasoned arguments of his doubting Thomas classmates, who wildly denounce Santa’s existence with no regard to shattering the hearts of those who believe. I never want to be responsible.  Maybe I took a cowards way out, but I told him that in life, we will find some people who believe differently than we do, and some people who sadly, don’t believe in anything. Sometimes we have to decide for ourselves what we believe in based on our own experiences. 

He nodded and never said anything. Maybe he was just thoughtfully mulling over what I had said.  He should have been thinking, “Santa’s been damned good to me- I think I’ll believe.” Or maybe he was contemplating who he should ask to get a real answer.  I really don’t know. I just tried to act nonplussed. I always think of The Polar Express. The jingle bell. I want him to hear it. The wonderful thing is that Christmas has a magic and a majesty that exists far beyond Santa Claus.

Visit the Northpole

http://northpole.com/ is a great Christmas resource. A fun site to visit together with your children.  There are games, recipes, learning activities, sources for toys, and interactive stories.

It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas

Whirling and twirling into another holiday season. Wanting to create a reality that surpasses the expectations.  I admit I am an anticipation junky.  It’s the party planner in me. I love the details of the holidays.  The perfect gifts, beautifully wrapped and decorated. The perfect spread of food, arranged on a stunning table display.  Bing Crosby and Elvis crooning in the background. A toasty fire, and scented candles to illuminate and scent rooms with pine and cinnamon.

“Superficial!” you might scream. Perhaps. These can definitely be the trappings of the holiday. But they are the backdrop to the moments of my family’s lives.  I want that backdrop to be magical, comforting, consistent. The world can go crazy outside our door, and we will find quiet moments around board games or snuggled on the couch, baking in the kitchen or feasting at the table. It is the one time of year when tradition is so thoughtfully embraced.  Laughter is the restorative melody. Joy has found its sanctuary.

What happens when things don’t happen according to this blissful scheme? I do get stressed around the holidays, but I have learned to enjoy the process, even the mall meltdowns and burnt cookies. We kick off the season with a day of thanks on Thanksgiving.  It’s grounding and therapeutic to humbly submit that our blessings may be more than we could ever be worthy of. While our eyes might not remain fixed on the true significance of the season, to move in the spirit of the season is an act of celebration in itself. 

Wrap It Up

In the next couple of days our family will take the time to clean up the pontoon, pull it out of the water and get it prepped for winter. It’s kind of sad.  Summer has been over for a good while, but looking out and not seeing the boat in the water is just a reminder that soon snow will cover the ground, and not long after that, ice will cover the lake.  There is a good deal of fun to be had on the ice. But it is definitely the summers on our lake that we enjoy the most.  In particular, summer on the boat.  

On calm summer mornings it’s the best start to a day to slowly cruise around the lake, enjoying coffee. I never get tired of watching the sun, shimmer like diamonds, across the water. Early morning, or late afternoon. Even the kids enjoy cruising around.  We have great conversations on the boat. The kids have our full attention, and we are all engaged. It is such a special time. Then there are the more lively moments. We often have a boat load of kids, climbing and jumping off the boat, swimming around and under it. We often pack picnics and spend hours in the middle of the lake or anchored on the sand bar. Our family dog, Abbey is also a fan of the boat.  As soon as she sees us heading towards it, she runs ahead and jumps on.  She won’t be left behind!  And on those rare occasions when we try to, she sits on the shore and cries, howls, so heart broken that we are forced to return to get her.

Soon the boat will be stored and we will only have the sweet memories of summer.  But that’s okay, they are some amazing memories.  And we also have the anticipation for next spring when we will uncover the boat and cruise around the lake that first time.

Housebound Blues

I never realized how isolated I would eventually feel being a stay at home mother.  Daily life is busy and of course filled with the activities of children. But after a while, I had a feeling of loneliness and emptiness.  It was a difficult feeling to acknowledge, because initially it made me wonder why was I not satisfied?  I had been given this amazing opportunity to be at home full time with my children who I not only loved, but truly enjoyed.  I wondered if it was a shortcoming on my part. I would feel anxious for my husband to come home from work, to hear about his day. I was anxious to hear accounts of people who I had worked with who he still saw periodically at work. When he would come home and be in a bad mood I couldn’t deal with it.  I told him that he was my only tie to the grown up world and I needed him to be in a good mood. How unfair is that? 

Eventually, I gained some perspective. I lost the feeling of guilt.  I accepted that it was a natural to feel lonely and miss the stimulation that adult contact provided.  I had always found balance difficult to achieve.  Where my husband was able to get in a golf league, and pursue his interest, I never could justify taking “me time” with all the tasks I had to do.  It was always me holding myself back because my husband was always supportive of me pursuing interests. I wish I could say that I’ve changed that but I really haven’t.  I am in touch with more friends than I used to be, though I rarely schedule time out with them.  I have returned to school.  It’s wonderful for my mind to feel challenged again. But even now, I feel like I am struggling between the children and the time that I need to study. They don’t really understand the demands of the school work and I don’t want to short change them because I have decided to go back to school. I wonder if balance will be this ever elusive element in my life.